# Voces inocentes


Today we all went over to the students from Mexico city who are working
at the project, they rent a house in the village. We saw [Voces
Inocentes](http://www.vocesinocentes.com/) (Innocent Voices), a movie
about some little boys growing up under [the civil war in El
Salvador](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_El_Salvador#From_Military_to_Civilian_Rule).
Although sometimes a bit clichy, it was still very well done, and
certainly managed to move the audience. The contrast between children
playing, making all the mistakes they have to make in order to grow up,
and soldiers, guerrillas fighting, mothers screaming. Friends dying.

In a way, this movie is similar to many others, [Hotel
Rwanda](http://www.mgm.com/ua/hotelrwanda/intro.html) being one of the
last one. As much as it hurts watching these movies, I think they have a
useful effect on me. They shake me. Make me remember the suffering in
the world. That I know so well, but that I tend to forget (how can we
forget?) in daily life. It makes me remember why I choose to study
International Development Studies.

Because I wanted to make a difference. Yeah - can you imagine words more
full of cliches? Especially in these Live-8 days. But deep down it does
have meaning. The question is not whether we can make a difference,
because we do - every day. But I wonder. What will I do - what will I be
able to contribute with? How will my expensive education help me? We are
studying the history of Africa, international economics… when what is
needed is engineers and doctors. My friend is delivering babies in Papua
New Guineau. I have had an amazing life, travelled and lived in several
continents, speak many languages. Yet still - the two skills I have to
offer is English teaching and modest computer skills. How will I be able
to improve that situation? And which skills *are* needed? What needs to
be done?

So many efforts to help have gone wrong, so many great plans turned into
disaster. A study of international development is a study of errors and
mistakes. And then there is the huge error in believing that only by
being in the frontline, can you make a difference. By being a Blue Beret
with the UN, or flying in to refugee camps with the UN helicopter
delivering AID. Maybe working on intercultural education programmes, on
antiwar and fair-trade projects in Western countries, on small
grassroots-based development programmes is not as sexy. But my egoism
and my sense of heroism is not what is important here, what matters is
building a foundation for something lasting. What matters is not being
the only one brave enough, “holy” enough to oppose something bad, but to
convince everyone that they can help and participate.

But what do I know? One can only try one’s best, I suppose.

Stian